Interview: Sam Apple, Author American Parent November 5, 2009 9:34 AM | permalink

Sam Apple (pictured) is the editor-in-chief of The Faster Times and author of Schlepping Through the Alps which was a finalist for the PEN/Martha Albrand Award for First Nonfiction. Apple’s work has appeared in a variety of publications, including The New York Times, Financial Times, and ESPN The Magazine. 

His latest book, American Parent: My Strange and Surprising Adventures in Babyland, explores the history of baby-rearing along with Apple's own hilarious and personal take on being plunged into the oft bizarre world of modern parenthood.

First the facts: How many kids do you have? Ages?

Three -- ages three, one, and one. I don't remember what sleep is. 

What’s the dumbest thing you’ve done as a parent?

That's a tough one. So many to choose from. Leaving the $700 stroller my father-in-law bought for us in Target is up there.

What is the kookiest facet of modern parenting you discovered while researching your book?

Well $700 strollers themselves are pretty kooky. But it's not just about strollers. Parents -- myself included -- are spending a lot of money on kooky toys and gadgets. One my favorites -- though I don't own one, alas -- is the Potty Monkey that is supposed to teach your children how to use the bathroom. It calls out to be taken to the bathroom periodically, and if you ignore it, it eventually announces that it has had an accident.

You once poured baby shampoo into your own eyes? Please graph and explain. No seriously, just explain.

I know it sounds like the dumbest thing of all time -- and, indeed, it might be -- but there was some logic to it. I had noticed that despite using "no tears" shampoo, my son always cried when we shampooed him. It occurred to me that though the shampoo makers said it didn't hurt, we really couldn't be so sure, since babies can't talk. There was only one way to find out... And, sure enough, it stings.

There’s been an explosion of toys, music and classes engineered to make babies smarter. Have you tried any of these and do you think a kid whose mom plays tambourine in a circle with them before they are a year old has an intellectual leg up? Basically, do toys and classes engineered to make kids smarter work?

No, I don't think they work. A good rule of thumb is that if a toy or class or kids show claims to be "developmental," it's almost certainly b.s. But I don't think that that's necessarily reason to abandon all the toys or classes. The classes can still be fun and the products, if they keep your baby occupied for a while, can help get you through some tough parenting moments. We've taken music classes with our kids not because I expect them to be great musicians -- or musicians at all -- but because they seem to have fun shaking the little instruments -- okay, mostly they just suck on the instruments. The classes would actually be much better if the teachers weren't forced to pretend like they were educational.

According to a professor quoted in the NY Times “I.Q. has risen sharply over time…Half the population of 1917 would be considered mentally retarded by today’s measurements.” So if not the new-fangled baby learnin’, what accounts for this?

This one is far outside my area of expertise. I think it's possible that the complexity of life in the modern world makes a difference. But I think we can safely say it's not the new-fangled baby learning. If there is a way to make babies smarter, no one has figured it out yet.

Is it true that natural childbirth is actually a Stalinist plot?

Sort of. The Lamaze Method does come from Stalinist Russia. It used to be known as the Pavlov Method. To make a long story very short, the Soviets wanted more women to have babies and they didn't have many drugs to ease the pain. The government pressured scientists into coming up with a pain-free natural birth program and the scientists then explained how it worked using Soviet--approved scientific theories that had been discredited decades earlier.

You found that there may be “a universal theory that can explain the origins of circumcision in many diverse cultures.” Well there may be time travelers amongst us or a as of yet undiscovered all-natural calorie-free version of Alfredo sauce. There may be lots of things… cough up some answers, Apple!

Well, I mean, something has to explain how so many different cultures came up with something so nutso on their own. Though there are plenty of theories, no one knows for sure. My own best guess is that it has something to do with a universal urge to make sacrifices to a higher power in exchange for rewards. If you really want to prove to God that you're serious about your sacrifice, you have to do something extreme. And circumcision is almost as extreme as you can get. You can go further. And some cultures have sacrificed children. But cultures that did that didn't tend to stick around for so long.

I think “family bed” is for parents who are weak-willed and can’t say no, resulting in the parents rarely getting nookie and nobody getting any sleep. But family bed practitioners think anyone who would boot their kid out of bed and leave them to cry it out are cruel humans who are permanently despoiling their kid’s self-esteem. So be honest, who’s right?

Well, I think you're closer to being right. I think people should sleep with their kids if they want to and that it can be a wonderful thing -- yada yada. But there's no evidence one way or the other as to how it might affect someone years later.

According to your book’s PR “Revenue from the sale of baby products has almost tripled since the mid-1990s, and the average American child now receives seventy new toys a year.” What could account for this sudden rise?

There are a lot of different theories and it's probably a combination of a lot of different factors: women tend to buy more of these products and moms now have more income and economic independence than ever before; people are having kids when they're older and have more disposal income; Americans were on a spending spree that only came to an end very recently. I think the biggest factor is probably the more sophisticated marketing to parents. I made the mistake of entering our son's birthday on some website and three year's later I'm still getting emails about what products he needs.

Before motherhood I once looked at a friend’s toddler scarfing down french fries at a diner and said I would never let mine do that. Flash ahead to now, and if I actually get to eat out in public with child, I am willing to give fries I.V. as a way to keep the kid happy and actually have a conversation. Is there anything you swore you would never do as a parent but now do?

I've definitely let my kids watch more baby videos than I thought would. When all three of them are screaming, the choice sometimes feels like Baby Einstein or suicide. I mean, who cares if it makes your kid smarter. Baby Einstein is really for parents.

You live in Park Slope, Brooklyn, a place that seems to have more strollers than mold spores. Do you feel heightened parenting pressure being surrounded by so many savvy urban parents?

The only time I've really felt the pressure is with respect to the lunches I make for my son. It seems like the other kids are all eating things like almond-crusted crepes filled with summer vegetables and sprinkled with fresh lemon juice. Can a crepe be almond-crusted? I just made that example up. The point is, they are eating fancy things I can barely pronounce and my son is eating peanut butter sandwiches on weirdly shaped -- something always seems to go wrong when remove the crust -- slices of bread.

What was your wildest experience researching your book?

I think it was probably when I went on a stakeout with a professional nanny spy. Like every dumb guy, I'd always dreamed of being on a stakeout. But it's sort of hard to sustain the fantasy of being on a topic secret, life-or-death, mission when you're sitting in a van waiting to see if a nanny puts a hat on a baby or not.

What’s the smartest advice you can offer to new or expecting parents?

Be skeptical of all the claims you hear for baby products or classes. The products and classes can be fun and useful, but when they claim to help your baby develop or become smarter, etc., there's usually very little -- or nothing -- to substantiate the claims.

Photo credits: Author image by Aaron Liebman; Joseph Stalin from the Library of Congress online catalog; baby and toys by Susie Felber; Sam Apple and his son by Morgan Levy

Dumb As An Interview: The Guinea Pig Diaries Author A.J. Jacobs October 20, 2009 2:38 PM | permalink

For the past 15 years, author and Esquire editor A.J. Jacobs has lived his life doing experiment after experiment- on himself.

For his book The Year Of Living Biblically he spent a year following the rules of the Bible. In The Know It All Jacobs describes his quest to read the entire Encyclopedia Britannica.

His new book The Guinea Pig Diaries talks about some of the other experiments that he has done over the past 15 years, including following George Washington’s personal list of civility and decent behavior, engaging in a program called Radical Honesty and even outsourcing his entire life to workers in India. He was kind enough to answer some of our questions. 

Many of your experiments seem to be combinations of high concepts designed to entertain the readers of your books and essays, along with genuine attempts to better yourself and learn something in the process. What’s more important; getting the laugh or learning something?

Can I say it’s a tie? Remember that word "edutainment?" Part education, part entertainment. I liked that word, even though it eventually became a punchline. Maybe I’d change the word to ‘entertation.’ Does that sound better?

Seeing as this is Dumb As A Blog, what is the dumbest thing you ever did in one of your experiments?

Probably stoning an adulterer. I was trying to follow the rules of the Bible as literally as possible, and Leviticus says we should stone adulterers. So I did. I used pebbles, so as not to get prosecuted. 

From your experiences following the rules of the bible, living by the guidelines of George Washington’s rules of civility, to Radical Honesty, to even allowing your wife Julie to write a rebuttal chapter, it seems that you have a bit of an obsession with satirizing the concepts of rules, ethics, honesty and fairness. As ridiculous as many rules are, doesn’t society need them?

Excellent question. I actually am a big fan of rules. I’m wary of people who take rules too literally, and who don’t allow for change or debate. I’m wary of people who say “The Bible says homosexuality is a sin, therefore it’s a sin forever and ever.”

But my experiments have actually made me more of a fan of rules than before. We often talk about freedom of choice. But there’s a beauty in having a structure, a set of rules, that limit our choices. I think it makes us happier. For instance, George Washington’s 110 rules of life are really wise – they’re all about self-restraint, self-sacrifice, respect. And not adjusting your crotch in public. That is literally his rule number two. And I’ve found it serves me well.

After 15 years of these experiments, have you come up with any rules that govern your own behavior when selecting a new experiment, or ethics about how you go through with it?

I want my experiments to have the potential to give me real insight. I want them to change my life for the better, even if just a little. It can’t be something like – I’m going to eat a cruller at every Dunkin’ Donuts in America and write about it (Though my wife does keep suggesting that I should take her to every restaurant in New York as my next book.)

In your experiment called “The Rationality Project,” you pasted pictures of eyes all over your house because a study showed that people behaved more ethically when they saw pictures of eyes, as it tricked their brains into thinking they are being watched and judged. You noted that your kids liked to get into staring contests with the eyes. Have your children been affected by any of your other experiments?

First, I do think having my walls adorned with pictures of eyes made my family behave a bit better. (Also, my book actually has big pictures of eyes on the cover, so just having it in the house can have a beneficial effect on your family. Just FYI). Overall, though, I try to keep my kids out of my experiments as much as possible. I don’t want to warp them. Sometimes it can’t be helped, of course. During my year of living biblically, I had this enormous beard, and when I shaved it off, my son was freaked out for a week or so. Who is this stranger in the apartment with his smooth cheeks?

In your books you come off as a fairly normal, semi-geeky guy with a good sense of humor about not just the world, but yourself, combined with a willingness to leap into extraordinarily wacky situations. You also have several cute kids, a skeptical but loving wife and a smoking hot nanny. I’ll put it out there; I smell sitcom. The only thing missing is you tripping over the ottoman as your theme music plays. Any plans in the works?

I like that ottoman idea! Let me know if you’re interested in working on a spec. I’ve had discussions about a sitcom, but I’m actually more interested in developing something unscripted. I’m working with the delightful Morgan Spurlock of Supersize Me and 30 Days fame.

If your life was to become a sitcom would you want to play yourself? If not, who would you like to play you? 

 Well, The Year of Living Biblically has been optioned for a movie by Paramount, and they’ve attached Marlon Wayans. I went out to lunch with him and had a great time. It’s an interesting choice, because if you look at our pictures side by side, you could probably – and I’m going out on a limb here – tell us apart.

 

truTV Facebook Fan Spotlight! October 14, 2009 1:58 PM | permalink

We have a Facebook Fan Page -- facebook.com/truTV -- that currently boasts over 22 thousand fans. On it we post sneak peeks, tag our real stars in photos and much more.  We read and appreciate all the comments left for us.  And yesterday, after posting a sneak for a new Rehab: Party at the Hard Rock Hotel, one comment stuck out.  This one:

When I saw this, I decided I had to know more.  So I contacted Paul -- a total stranger, pictured at left -- and asked him for an interview.  He obliged and I think the result is pretty excellent.  Check it out.

So, video game or truTV -- which did you choose? What was it like? Did you make the right decision?

I ended up choosing truTV. How could I not ? I get to watch beautiful women with a side order of drama on Rehab. I gotta say, one of the best decisions I have made in a while. I even watched the re-run just for the fun.

Was that comment intended to make us jealous? If so, it worked.

Originally, it was not meant to make you folks jealous, it was an actual dilemma that I was forced to address at the time, but thinking back on it now, it worked pretty well didn’t it?

What is yer new video game, incidentally?

Well, the new Tim Schafer game (who in my opinion is one of the funniest guys in the video game industry). Brutal Legend came out today, I went to the midnight release at the local game store, so I was able to curb my urges because I played that beast till 3 in the AM. I tend to function just fine on a few hours of sleep.

What are the three best video games of all time?

That is very hard thing to answer. I mostly play video games for the single player aspect, so they will be based on my favorite single player experiences These are all on the Microsoft console X-Box 360.

1. Grand Theft Auto 4 – Rockstar
2. Ninja Gaiden 2 – Team Ninja
3. Splosion Man – Twisted Pixel

What is the dumbest video game ever?

Most games that come out and coincide with a movie that is being released in theaters at the same time are usually terribly made and only sell because of the license development companies get with the movies. If you want proof, please type "E.T. the video game" into Google. Case in point.

Anything else you want to tell the world?

All the people on the Facebook page for truTV, please, for the love of all known deities that you may follow and believe in, if you do not like a particular show that the page is posting for, please do not ruin the experience for fans to get together and chat about their shows, it is thoroughly irritating.  Thank you, this has been a public service announcement. :P

Any sites of yours can we link to?

My personal blog that a friend and I have started – gamingsimplicity.blogspot.com

And a friend's blog that is the sister site to ours. He is trying to become a real gaming journalist, so hope he enjoys the plug :) – jags-corner.blogspot.com

Thanks Paul!

Exclusive Interview: AJ Mass, Former Mr. Met September 28, 2009 10:00 AM | permalink

From 1994-1997, AJ Mass (pictured) worked as Mr. Met, the mascot for the New York Mets baseball team . 

There's a video reel of AJ doing his thing on his blog and he is currently shopping a book about his experiences working it as the big-baseball headed one. 

Read on to find out how he got the job, what challenges donning the head brought and what shocking tell-all mascot revelations might be revealed in a Mr. Met book.

First off: Are you a Mets fan? Was that a prerequisite for the job?

I am. Growing up within walking distance of Shea Stadium, it was going to be difficult to not root for the hometown team. However the first prerequisite for the job was whether I fit the suit.

How did you get the job and who was Mr. Met before you?

I was the first Mr. Met of the modern era. There was an incarnation of Mr. Met in the 60s, but he was phased out long before the the Phillie Phanatic or the San Diego Chicken redefined what mascots were going to be.

I actually auditioned to be an actor in the Nickelodeon Stage Shows that were going to be part of a mini-theme park outside of Shea. I got the gig, and then they mentioned they were going to bring back Mr. Met and anyone interested could volunteer to learn more. Only three of us stuck around, and much like Johnny Bravo on The Brady Bunch, I fit the suit.

How is the pay? The hours? What kinds of events did you do outside of games?

The pay was hourly at first, just as an extra part of the Nick job. After the baseball strike in 1994, though, the theme park closed down. I was asked to stay.

By the time I left it was a full-time job but with no health benefits. The hours? If there was an appearance at a charity event or Little League field or some such event, I could be in the costume at 9AM, back at the stadium for the day game scheduled at 1PM (with pre-game duties/birthday parties starting at 11AM) and after three hours of baseball, finally done for the day at 5PM assuming the game didn't go extra innings, of course. Considering that home stands could last 7-12 days, I might be working for weeks at a time without a day off.

Was the job more or less fun than you expected?

I loved the interaction with kids. That alone was worth every bit of grief from management, who never quite understood what it took to do the job of mascot properly.

For example, they didn't know why I couldn't bend the laws of physics to be in three different locations in the stadium at the same time, or why I needed to take a 20 minute break after an hour in the costume on an August afternoon. Part of the reason I did stay in the suit longer than I probably should have is that I didn't want any of those kids being disappointed.

How hard was the costume to wear? Is the head heavy? How do you stay cool in it on hot summer days?

The costume itself went through changes over the years to make it easier to move around in. The sheer size of the head made it difficult to maneuver. Forget about peripheral vision.

There's no way of sugar-coating how hot it got being encased in a 20-pound polyurethane sphere in the middle of a heat wave. You'd take a towel and soak it in ice water and wrap it around your neck and shoulders and it would be bone dry by the time you hit the field. You simply endured.

Which ballplayers gave you an especially hard time?

There still weren't a huge number of baseball mascots around when I started, maybe a third of the teams had one, but the players who had played for teams with mascots tended to get it and were supportive.

Surprisingly, it was some of the Mets themselves, who were not used to having a stranger around the tunnels leading to the clubhouse, who were unreceptive at best and antagonistic at worst. I'll save the naming of names for the book I'm currently shopping around.

Does your book proposal contain shocking revelations like mascot groupies or mascots injecting one another with performance-enhancing drugs?

Mr. Met is actually part-zombie and part-vampire. That's not true, but I hear that's the only way to get a book sold these days

Seriously, part of the reason I wanted to write a book about my time as a professional mascot is that most people have no idea what a mascot actually goes through on a regular basis. In my four years on the job, I was abused by players, reprimanded by umpires, nearly trampled to death by exuberant parade-goers,  and even had my life threatened by Secret Service agents. Not to mention that I once a encountered a very gruesome naked celebrity.

Your head is a huge baseball. Did it ever occur to you that the best place to hang around was not a baseball park, where everyone had baseball bats? Or were you safe because the Mets aren't very good at hitting baseballs?

Touche! Actually, imagine how bad of an idea Bat Day was for a team with a baseball-headed mascot. And yet, management didn't seem to understand why I had a problem with visiting the upper deck when they'd armed hordes of under-supervised summer campers with large wooden sticks. Talk about nightmares!

Was there ever a Mr. Yankee? Why not? What have you done with him?

The Yankees never needed a cartoonish mascot since they had Phil Rizzuto, their beloved announcer. And I mean that with complete respect. The Scooter was a living embodiment of fandom and excitement that made a mascot unnecessary for the Yankees, just as Harry Caray served that role for the Cubs.

What do you think of the Mets new ballpark?

I haven't been to CitiField yet. I do watch most games on TV, thanks to the dish, and it looks great. As much as I loved Shea from the standpoint of a lot of great moments in my life happened there, it was a dump.

Why did you stop being Mr. Met?

The short answer is that I was fired by e-mail during the 1997 off-season. Looking back, I probably could have fought and gotten the job back, but in my heart I knew it was time to move on.

In general, whats the turnover rate in mascot land? Like how long does your typical Philly Phanatic reign?

The current Phanatic, Tom Burgoyne, is only the second in the history of the character which dates back to 1978. Dave Raymond was the first and worked until 1993.

So Tom started the same year I did, and is still going strong but that's the exception, not the rule. Unfortunately, other organizations aren't as kind to the guys (or girls) inside the costumes as Philly is, and as such, when it's time to cut costs, they'll usually take the guy making $40K a year and replace him with a $10 an hour college kid, thinking it won't matter. But it does.You really do get what you pay for, but it's hard to convince some people otherwise when it comes to mascots. It's amazing to me that teams seem to care so little about the way they support their most visible marketing tool.

You can read AJ's blog at http://www.ajmass.blogspot.com/ or follow him on Twitter at http://twitter.com/AJMass. Plus he's got a day job as a fantasy sports analyst for ESPN.com.

Images: Left; AJ with Rachel Robinson, Jackie Robinson's widow, 1997. Right; AJ with his son at a minor league game. Bottom left; Mr. Met as Elvis from AJ's reel

Dumb As An Interview: I'm Perfect, You're Doomed Author Kyria Abrahams September 16, 2009 6:29 PM | permalink

Kyria Abrahams is a stand-up comedian, spoken-word poet, web producer and author of the recent memoir "I'm Perfect, You're Doomed: Tales from a Jehovah's Witness Upbringing." The book tells the humorous and heartfelt story of one woman’s tangled path navigating a difficult early life, in which her family's religious fundamentalism was an integral part.  She was kind enough to answer some of our questions.
 
Since this is Dumb As a Blog, we have to ask: what is the dumbest part of being raised a Jehovah’s Witness?

The reason they give for not celebrating birthdays is possibly the pinnacle of dumb. In the bible, John The Baptist is beheaded at King Herod's birthday feast. Because of this, obviously, all birthdays are pagan and will involve a beheading. That's why Jehovah's Witness children are forced to sit in the back of the room and cry-pray while their classmates joyfully eat delicious cake – they are afraid of being beheaded.
 
You mention in your book that Smurfs were considered evil in the eyes of the church, but Snorks were A-OK. Have you ever been able to figure out why? Is it because the Smurfs were French?
 
Actually, I believe Smurfs are Belgian. If only I hadn't been raised as a Jehovah's Witness I might be educated enough to make a decent joke about the Dutch. Ultimately, I guess when you try to decide the holiness of Hanna-Barbera cartoon characters based on a 3,000-year old scroll, you're going to have inconsistencies.
 
You outline many things that the Jehovah’s Witnesses do, that seem, to an outsider, to be odd. Is there anything about the church that they do right, or that you miss?
 
I miss knowing that everything I was doing in my life was right, that God loves me like a daughter and that I'm going to live forever on an earthly paradise with a pet panda. That's not the sort of thing that can easily be replaced. I also miss hating homosexuals and Jews. Oh, to be young again!

I found it kind of strange that Jehovah’s Witnesses refer to those who are not in the church as “worldly,” a word that I have never heard as a negative. To me, someone who is worldly has education and experience with the ways of the world. How do they manage to define that as a bad thing?

It's from some scripture they love to quote which says that God's chosen people are "no part of this world" -- hence the negative slur "worldly." They won't come right out and admit it, but it's an “us against them” scenario. And who doesn't love an underdog, outside of Apollo Creed?

Have you spoken to former and current Jehovah’s Witnesses over the course of promoting this book? What have they said to you? Do you agree with anything they have said?

I can count on one hand the interactions I’ve had with still-active Jehovah’s Witnesses, because I’m an evil apostate and they are instructed to eschew my evil. The most interesting responses are on YouTube, from Jehovah's Witnesses who don’t realize that my videos are a parody and try to tell the characters that they aren’t acting in a Godly manner.

One of the performance or “slam” poets that you write about in the book, makes a stunningly heartwarming gesture to you, effectively allowing you to achieve a measure of independence. Yet you write about these people at times like they are more off the wall than some of the quirkiest Jehovah’s Witnesses. So who is more screwed up:  Fundamentalists, slam poets or stand-up comedians?

Fundamentalists. They’re the only ones who will deny they are crazy.

What’s next for you? Going to church on Sunday?

I’m just waiting for the obscure first-memoir cash-money to start rolling in so I can buy the Watchtower factory building in downtown Brooklyn and turn it into a Wiccan Hooters.

Note: Author Photo by Todd Serencha

 

Dumb As An Interview: Idiot America Author Charles Pierce July 23, 2009 10:21 AM | permalink

Charles P. Pierce is sportswriter, columnist and author who has written for the New York Times Magazine, Esquire, GQ, Sports Illustrated and other publications. He is a regular panelist on National Public Radio's "Wait Wait... Don't Tell Me!" and his new book is Idiot America.

We asked him a few questions about idiots, Americans and how they both tie into the premise of his book.

In your book, you seem to have great disdain for people who are idiots, yet an odd admiration for people who seem off their rockers. What’s the difference?

I differentiate between what I call authentic American cranks like Ignatius Donnelly, whose pseudo-science is responsible for all we think we know about Atlantis, and the people who today [enjoy] mainstream craziness without the ameliorating effects of a pushback. As I point out, a charlatan is a crank with a big book deal. A charlatan is a crank who's sold out.

Does anything give you hope that America might be getting smarter?

We're more informed than we ever were. We're overwhelmed by more information from more directions at the same time. The problem is a) that our internal editing function is overwhelmed and  b) that we are so fairminded that we believe that because there are two sides to every question, they both must be right. In combination, we believe that which sells best, not that which is true. I don't see that getting better any time soon.

You write that Idiot America is a collective act of will by our entire culture, that allows nonsense to have consequences beyond simple ridicule. So then, can a smarter and better America be achieved through mockery? Seems a bit cruel.

Mockery has been an important part of informed citizenry ever since the concept of citizenry was invented. Satire is a weapon of the disenfranchised and the un-empowered. One of the most distressing developments of recent times is that people like Rush Limbaugh and Ann Coulter are regularly referred to as "satirists," when, in fact, they are mere bullies on behalf of the established powers. I don't argue that mockery makes us smarter, but it can make us better citizens. I hope Sarah Palin comes to realize this.

In your opinion, who is the stupidest person in America?

Besides the guy who was in my rear-view mirror texting at 70 mph on Rte. 93 this morning? It's a tough call, but I'd pick the person whose fame and success best conforms to what I call the Three Great Premises of Idiot America:  1) Any theory is valid if it moves units 2) Anything can be true if someone says it loudly enough 3) Fact is what enough people believe and truth is how fervently they believe it.

That would be Palin, Queen of the Northwoods.

You seem to point the finger at former President Bush, saying that a symptom of Idiot America involves people thinking with their guts instead of their brains. But isn’t instinct valuable on some level? The late David Halberstam’s book The Best and the Brightest is about how the smartest people of a generation led us into the disaster of Vietnam. Can brains and instinct co-exist? How do we draw that line?

Best question I've been asked on this tour.

I would argue that, in the strictest sense, while the people in Halberstam's book were undoubtedly brilliant, they were inexpert in counterinsurgency warfare, Asian history and politics and the dynamics of post-colonial developing nations. Hubris is not intelligence any more than instinct is. Idiot America is the result of a celebration, not of stupidity, but of in-expertise.These guys qualified.

Are there countries stupider than America?

Probably. But very few that celebrate it in their politics quite as goofily as we do.

Any particularly dumb things happen in America since you finished the book--things that you wish you could have included?

Well, as I said, Sarah's an ongoing joy. I think there are elements of the health-care debates that qualify, and Michael Steele this week talked about the sanctity of someone's relationship with their health-insurance company. That was pretty funny.

You have said in other interviews that one of the best ways to pull this country out of the notion that perception is reality is to learn to distinguish between entertainment and information. With that in mind, would you call your book entertaining or informative?

Somebody called it a "political beach-read," which I rather liked. I think the section called "Consequences" is the most serious part of the book. There are consequences for believing and acting upon nonsense, and for abdicating our responsibilities as self-governing citizens. We can walk away from those responsibilities, but not from the consequences of walking away.

Exclusive: Man on the Street Interview July 7, 2009 4:02 PM | permalink

Rep. Peter King of New York made a splash by posting a video rant on YouTube attacking Michael Jackson.  King started by talking about all kinds of positive patriotic stuff and then quickly swung around to Jackson, calling the deceased performer "a low life" and twice "a pervert." Adding, "He was a child molester. He was a pedophile." 

As the King of Pop was acquitted of charges he molested a 13-year-old boy, I'm not sure where King, Long Island's only Republican congressman, is getting his facts.  As you can see, on King's site, he has a "kids corner" right next to his contact info and his mug.  Is the congressman trying to lure young children?  Sure looks like it!

In any case, I happened to be on Long Island today in King's district and I decided to go the extra mile and find out what residents of Jericho, NY thought of their Congressman's video antics.  Enjoy this exclusive trip to find out the answers!

Meet Him Now, See Him on a New Forensic Files Tomorrow May 21, 2009 2:36 PM | permalink

Marc W. Juretus, pictured, is not a detective, but he will play one on truTV.  Juretus is a comedian and actor based in Whitehall, PA who I discovered this week when I was panning our Twitter feed and found him tweeting about how he was going to appear on a new episode of Forensic Files tomorrow, Friday, at 10PM e/p on truTV.

@Marcjuretus Catch me Friday May 22nd on "Forensic Files" episode is called "Smiley Face". Airs on truTV. 

Now, of course, Forensic Files always profiles real stories and interviews the real people associated with the case, but there are also those reenactments to bring the scene alive.  That's where Juretus comes in.  We thought you might like to get to know who the real person behind the bit part, how they got it and what kind of bank they make doing it.   

Who did you play?

A detective in an interrogation room scene.

How long did the shoot take and how much were you paid?

Two to three hours and I was paid $150.

As a comedian, is it hard to play serious parts?

Not at all. I've played a cop a few times on Law & Order and in the new Jamie Foxx film Law Abiding Citizen.

Your website says you are friends with "The Amish Comic." Is he really Amish?  Do you guys tour together in his horse and buggy?

Ha. Yes he's Amish... We don't tour together per say but do about 10-20 shows a year.  It's funny when I do work with him and I witness the culture shock to the audience.  They tend to ask me questions about the Amish.  Like I have a clue!  I always say, "Could you picture a brother driving an Amish buggy? We'd throw a set of rims on it tint the windows and give the horse some gold teeth just to keep it real."

Any upcoming live shows or appearances?

I'll be in Jackson, NJ on May 30th as well as Coplay, PA on June 13th at Coplay EMS on Levans Rd.
Also listen to me June 18th at 7AM on the Bearman and Keith show on 95.1 WZZO out of Allentown.

MoCap, LLC Creator Chris DeLuca: The Dumb Interview April 24, 2009 12:00 PM | permalink

Chris DeLuca (second from left) is the creator, writer, co-star and executive producer of the new sitcom MoCap, LLC.which makes it's premiere this week on Spike TV. He has written comedy for The Late Late Show, Best Week Ever, and the 2008 Spike Video Game Awards hosted by Jack Black. His blog, "What Sucks" has been a longtime staple on our blogroll, and he has been a big supporter of ours as well. He was kind enough to answer some questions about his new comedy show, set in the world of video game design.

What does  “mocap” mean?

Mocap or “motion capture,” is defined as the digital recording of movement for use in video games. Normally when you see it, it's a famous athlete in that suit with the balls on it recording the movements of say, Lebron James dunking a basketball. What MoCap, LLC covers is the mocap not done by the Lebron Jameses of the world.  Have you ever hit someone with a crowbar in Grand Theft Auto 4?  It looks real.  Why? Because there are some pretty dedicated motion capture artists out there. Their sacrifice is for gamers everywhere. 

MoCap, LLC started out as a web series, but is now on  TV. How did that process happen?

Going from web to TV could eventually serve as an alternative to the pilot process currently employed by networks.  It's a little more democratic.  It allows someone to make what amounts to a mini-pilot, put it on the web and see if people like it.  If done correctly, this kind of thing could prevent the world from suffering the needless pain brought on by Viva Laughlin or a remake of The Bionic Woman.

Since this is “Dumb as a Blog,” I should ask about the character you play, Frank. He doesn't seem very smart. What's the hardest part about playing somebody stupid?  

It's not so much that he's dumb, he's just jaw-droppingly un-self-aware, a quality that I can definitely pull from my own life. He lies about things that are very easy to refute, and his general manager, Claire, (played by Kara Klenk) is always there to set the record straight . For example, Frank will say he went to film school at Columbia. Claire reveals that he went to school at Columbia, the country; University of Cartagena.

I read an advance review that said one of the funniest scenes in the show was “the torture scene,” a subject that is in the news quite a bit these days. What's so funny about torture?

Well, first off; waterboarding? Come on! That's hilarious. You realize the guy's NOT REALLY DROWNING, right?

But seriously, one thing I love about our show is that despite having a fat dude in a tight blue suit and a hot intern who's often in a bikini, we manage to make some smart, topical jokes.  In our first episode, we talk about the hardcore military games we've worked on in the past, like Child Soldier: African Civil War. Then, of course, the scene ends up being over-the-top. The torture stuff in our first episode is also like that.  But don't worry, we also heavy-handily “learn our lesson” and celebrate what America is all about.  I don't want to give too much away but there's a woman, body-painted green to play the Statue of Liberty, who gives Jeff a lap dance. There's something for everybody.

Meet truTV Fan Kelly Divine April 15, 2009 2:30 PM | permalink

Here at truTV we're always on the lookout to find fans of the network. So imagine our pleasant surprise when we learned that our favorite adult film actress, the lovely Kelly Divine, was a big fan.

We contacted the star of such films as "I Love Big Toys #11" and "Whatabooty #3" to ask her about her life, her truTV viewing habits and if she'd be open to doing a Snuggie-based skin flick.

What kind of show would you want to star in on truTV?

I'd like to be one of the celebrity commentators on The Smoking Gun Presents: World's Dumbest.

What is your favorite show on the network?

I love Forensic Files, I know I sound morbid but its my favorite thing to watch!

The last time you watched truTV, what were you wearing? Sweatpants? Thong? Thong and sweatpants?

Sweatpants, no panties and a sports bra.

What is the most shocking thing you’ve ever seen?

I saw a plainclothes police officer and a robber get into a shootout across a strip mall parking lot. It was so scary and I thought it was reckless with all the people shopping. I was just a kid.

What’s the most daring thing you’ve ever done?

I've never ran from the cops but I'm great at lying to them...that sounds bad but I guess it's daring.

 Ever been caught by a cop and gotten out of trouble using your looks and charm?

Many times! I once got caught peeing in public but the cop liked me and let me go. Every time he saw me around after that, that's what he used to start a conversation.

Do you have any secret nerdy hobbies or interests like Dungeons and Dragons or reading Wikipedia to the wee hours?

Watching truTV every day.  Seriously, I don't change the channels unless its to watch Cold Case Files. I love to read and cook too.

Are there any fetishes you don’t get or think are just plain dumb?

Balloon fetish and smoking fetish.... don't get it.

Would you do a Snuggie-based adult flick?

Maybe, but it looks boring to me, LOL.

What’s your favorite porn movie title? Is it Forrest Hump?

Nope, it's Kelly's Black Book. A movie I directed and starred in. 

What is your porn name, your first pet and the street where you grew up?

Scooby Madison. LOL

Describe the first time you saw porn.

I was young a stumbled upon my parents stash. I was disgusted, it scared me for some reason. I guess I just didn't understand. I also found the Playboy with Madonna and her hairy pits on the cover. That may have had an effect.

When were you happiest?

I'm happiest now. My career is just taking off and I'm totally excited. I've grown a lot in the past two years and the changes in my life have been extreme. It took me everything to get here and now that I am I am enjoying it all.

Anything you wished I’d asked but I didn’t?

What am I having for dinner tonight? Pork chops, LOL.