The Five Dumbest Beauty Pageant Moments
The internets are abuzz this morning after Carrie Prejean, Miss California, the runner-up in last night's Miss USA pageant, answered a question from blogger Perez Hilton about gay marriage, saying (among other somewhat convoluted things) that marriage "should be between a man and a woman."
In response, Hilton blasted back with some NSFW language. Whenever a snarky queen calls a leggy blonde "a dumb b***h," it calls us to action quicker than a brightly blazing bat-signal above Gotham City. Clearly, we are needed.
Whatever your position on gay marriage, this is a dumb answer, but where does it belong in the pantheon of great dumb moments in beauty pageant history? Should it crack our top five here? If so, which one should it replace?
#5 Miss USA Falls Down
Some say she's just clumsy. I say, if your only job is walking and looking pretty, you should be able to do them both at the same time. It's not like we're asking you to chew gum or anything.
#4) Child Beauty Pageant Parents Get In Brawl
Sadly, we don't have any tape of the children who participated in this pageant. Still, if this is how their parents behave, we don't have high hopes for them.
#3) Star Wars Trumpet Gal
An oldy, but a goody. This trumpet player really blows.
#2) All Beauty Pageant Contestants, Ever
There's no epic train wreck here, but I use this clip to remind us that even in pageants that don't fly off the rails, the bar is still awfully low. Watch as these contestants fail to answer the question, compare themselves to Oprah, say their greatest challenge was entering a granite business, claim "self-esteem issues" are the most challenging thing facing women (sorry breast cancer!) and define heroes as people who "think positive." I'm just saying, the smartest finalist in the bunch appears to be the chick who sells rocks. Before we dub someone the dumbest beauty contestant in history, remember, the smartest ones aren't exactly coming up with polio vaccines.
#1) Miss Teen South Carolina 2007
I know what I said in #2, but man-o-man, I could watch this about a million times. Will anyone ever outdumb this clip?
For more beauty pageant train wrecks, check out our Beauty Queens in Trouble photo gallery.
Oops!
http://www.johnmaszka.com/whatchagotgirl.html
Posted by: John | 04/20/09 6:51PM
Marriage is between a man and a woman.
Posted by: Convolution | 04/21/09 11:23AM
Convolution is right, your blog is convoluted and intelligence specious.
Posted by: WTF | 04/26/09 11:47AM