Teen Shoplifts Using Stomach, Cops Say December 2, 2008 12:29 PM | permalink

William A. Colburn (pictured) 18, was seen shoplifting $16 earrings at a JCPenny by placing them in a bottle of VitaminWater, according to police in Naples, FL. 

If this doesn't sound like a dumb criminal yet, wait.

Cops say that when Colburn was escorted back into the store by a security officer, he proceeded to chug the drink, jewelry and all.

His alleged tactic backfired when he was whisked to a local hospital for an X ray, which reportedly revealed the bling inside him.

He was arrested for petty theft, tampering with evidence and possession of marijuana.  Might that last charge explain his metal munchies?

In any case, JC Penny assures us that if the earrings are recovered, they will not be returned to the sales floor.

Comments

[Joelogon]

Whoa, that is a CSI-like graphic you've got there, Feb.

[Susie]

Thanks Joe! Yeah, what you don't know is that graphic represents the full extent of my Photoshop knowledge. Sad -- true!

[Ken]

If he swallowed the earrings, they definitely wouldn't be in the position shown in the "x-ray." They would be in the esophageus or in the stomach or even lower in the gastro-intestinal tract.

[SFG]

you need to fix the link to teen tummy trouble. Did you notice that there is not 1 vote? That's because the link does not go to the correct story.

[samantha]

this is fucken funny its the best one lol

[Marc]

I think Ken is a doctor. How else would he know that the X-ray is fake? Maybe he reads the same medical journal as my three year old nephew. "Everybody poops."

[Garcia]

Marijuana does not create criminals. Studies have acutally shown adults who smoke marijuana generally make more money then adults who dont smoke marijuana.

The legends of Marijuanas negative effects were created by a lumber company owner that was going to loose his job if Marijuana replaced trees for paper. WHich he made illegal cause it was going to happen in the 1910's.