truTV: Not Reality. Actuality.

Have you ever wanted to ask a stranger what the dumbest part of their job is? Well, we have and can and did. In this latest installment, we ask comedian Abbi Crutchfield to tell us about her job.  Abbi’s comedy schedule is packed but luckily she took time out to answer a few of our dumb questions.

What’s the dumbest thing a stand-up comedian can do before a show?

One of the dumbest things you can do before a show is dip both hands into a bowl of baked beans. You’re gonna get it all over the host, the microphone, and probably your face when you come to the part of your act where you thoughtfully stroke your chin.  It will be a big distraction the whole show. Then you’ve got your head shots to worry about when everyone wants an autograph. It’s a classic, rookie move. 

Continue reading “Comedian Abbi Crutchfield is no small-time chump” »

Have you ever wanted to ask a stranger what the dumbest part of their job is? Well, we have and can and did. This week we ask stand-up comedian Luke Thayer to tell us about the dumbest parts of his job. And thankfully, he was happy to tell us.

What’s the dumbest thing a stand-up comedian can do before a show?

Get drunk. Remember how funny, coherent, and not annoying you always are when drunk? Well then you’re the only one that remembers that, cause you weren’t. Be a professional. A lawyer wouldn’t show up drunk so neither should a comedian. 

Continue reading “Luke Thayer dishes up the dumb side of stand-up comedy” »

Have you ever wanted to ask a stranger what the dumbest part of their job is? Well, we have and can and did. We asked stand-up comedian (and he’s also a musician, writer and storyteller) Colin Dempsey to tell us about the best dumb highlights of his funny career. And thankfully, he was happy to tell us.

What’s the dumbest thing a stand-up comedian can do before a show?

Eat an entire block of fried cheese which I once did half an hour before hosting my own show. It was a disaster, unless you think an impression of Steven Wright on Valium with gas is funny. In that case, it was a hilarious success.

What’s the worst joke you ever told on stage?

Pretty much everything I said in the first year of doing stand up and most of the second. By the third year I had learned to tone down my Irish accent a little and speak slower so at least the audience could understand what they didn’t like about my act. Specific jokes? Probably the ones about minor life irritations while performing on a show to cheer patients at an upper east side cancer ward. An audience battling cancer isn’t particularly receptive to material on roommates hogging the shower in the morning.

What’s the dumbest thing a heckler ever said to you on stage?

Not exactly a heckle, but one time after bombing on stage for a painful 15 minutes a guy in the audience hugged me as I walked through the crowd to leave and said, “Welcome to America bro, you passed the test!” I’m still not sure what he meant.

Find out more about Colin Dempsey!

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We asked award-winning comedian Jessica Delfino, pictured, to tell us about the dumbest job she ever had. Thankfully, the writer/performer of “My Pussy is Magic” and “I Wanna Be Famous” was happy to share her bizarre experience working at Google for a day.  Private to Google: We can teach you how to light farts — call us!

What’s the dumbest job you’ve ever had?
I mean, if by “dumb” you mean I got paid a disturbingly large sum of money to teach 40 Google engineers to play the ukulele, then, yeah, that’d be it.

What’s the dumbest thing you had to do there?
They provided endless frozen piña coladas served in coconuts so the hardest part of my job was to simply try and stay sober.

What do you wish you were told before you took the job?
Engineers brains are far too big and filled with genius knowledge to give a rat’s ass about playing a G chord on the ukulele.

Anything else to share about your time there?
We ate a lunch that took over two hours at a just OK Mexican restaurant down the road which was a double waste, since Google has three private cafeterias stocked better than my paternal Grandmother’s liquor cabinet.

Find out more about Jessica Delfino!

The Worldwide Leader in Dumb! Find us on Facebook and Twitter.

Another day, another dollar — but how crazy is it to make your living trying to be funny?  We asked stand-up
comedian Sharon Spell to tell us about the dumbest parts of her job.

What’s the dumbest thing a stand-up comedian can do before a show?

Drugs. Unless you need them to function, then it's not doing drugs.

What’s the worst joke you ever told on stage?

The worst jokes I ever told on stage are the ones without punchlines. Never tell a joke without a punchline. That's called, "complaining."

What’s the dumbest thing a heckler ever said to you on stage?

"Get off the stage."  No, stupid, I just got on the stage. What a dummy!

Find out more about Sharon Spell here!

The Worldwide Leader in Dumb! Find us on Facebook and Twitter.

Have you ever wanted to ask a stranger what the dumbest part of their job is? Well, we have and can and did. This week, we asked stand-up comedian Sue Funke, pictured, to tell us about the dumbest parts of her job. And thankfully, she had plenty to tell us.

What is the dumbest thing a stand-up comedian can do before a show?

Get waaaay too wasted. It can be okay to be a tad buzzed, but if you're sh*tfaced on stage you're basically asking an audience to pay to watch something they could get for free at a bad frat party.

What's the worst joke you ever told on stage?

My "layoff jokes" were super bitter. It was the classic instance of the comedy equation being off;  comedy = tragedy + timing. But when you're a comic and you get a sympathetic "awwwww" it kinda makes you wanna scream, like, "Don't feel bad for me, laugh at me, dammit!"

What's the dumbest thing a heckler ever said to you on stage?

One time I said that Whitney Houston kinda looked like Cynthia from The Real Housewives Of Atlanta, the same week Whitney Houston died. Someone shouted out "Too soon!" Apparently speaking ill of the dead includes saying that they looked like a former model turned Bravo-lebrity.

Have you ever wanted to ask a stranger what the dumbest part of their
job is? Well, we have and we did. This week we ask stand-up
comedian Molly Knefel to tell us about the dumbest parts of her job. Thankfully, she had some hot dumb to dish out.

DAAB: What’s the worst joke you ever told?

MK: "I went to the gynecologist on the hottest day of
the year. Nothing like a cold speculum on a hot morning, eh ladies?" –This was one
of the first jokes I ever wrote and although I know I'm using the "eh
ladies?" ironically, it's still inexcusable.

DAAB: What’s the dumbest thing a heckler ever said to you on stage?

MK: I
haven't really been heckled much. Maybe I just look like I will burst into tears if
you heckle me. Which I might.

Find out more about Molly Knefel here!

The Worldwide Leader in Dumb! Find us on Facebook and Twitter.