A 21-year-old British man recently plead guilty to vandalism after going on a rampage with a slingshot, committing 11 offenses while covering a massive 15-mile area. Bart Simpson would be proud.
According to the Surrey Mirror, Danny Jeeves allegedly got his hands on the slingshot at the Edenbridge and Oxted Show earlier this year and, after a few drinks, decided it was a good time to do about £3,000 worth of damage around town.
As a result of his admittedly “mind-boggling stupidity,” Jeeves lost his job and his girlfriend of over a year. Apparently, no woman wants to be dating a man with the hobbies of a 13-year-old.
Carol Fern the prosecutor told the court, “Mr Jeeves, clearly curious at what the catapult could do, decided to try it out. But he was intoxicated with alcohol. He got into his then girlfriend’s car and began to shoot at cars in the car park at the showground.”
Yes, in England, they call slingshots “catapults.” And they call women “birds.” So my guess is that if any of those cars Jeeves hit were owned by women, there were definitely a few angry birds around town. You know, because the Angry Birds use a slingshot? Hey, it was a stretch, but I got there.