According to the Pittsburgh Post-Gazette, locals in the town of Scott, PA, are upset over new traffic safety fixtures that apparently resemble a man’s junk.
“The posts, called bollards, were installed on Carothers and Finley avenues in the Glendale section of Scott to prevent wayward traffic from running into yards and structures,” the Post-Gazette reports. “But the elongated shape and rounded top of the bollards has drawn some derision.”
The cylindrical, narrow structures effectively create images that look like something more appropriate for a naughty Snapchat photo. Local residents have taken to calling one of the streets “Penis Road.” Was Dildo Drive already taken? How about Boner Boulevard?
Some residents think the male organs are hard to see, but others just find them hard. City officials are now looking into how much it will cost to flatten the tops of the fixtures, meaning that in this town, residents will never again have to worry about a shortage of “just the tip” jokes.
Other officials attributed the complaints to people with “weird minds,” with one man going as far as to suggest that people need to “get their minds out of the gutter.” Of course, it’ll be much easier to do that once city officials get their penises out of the sidewalk.