Sunday, May 19th was a pretty terrible day to get lost on a mountain, you know, assuming you weren’t Taylor Powers (pictured, on Facebook), who authorities say got pulled off a mountain in Colorado after thirty-five assorted rescue personnel from the Boulder County Sheriff’s Office Deputies, Boulder Open Space and Mountain Parks, Boulder Fire Rescue, American Medical Response, and The Rocky Mountain Rescue Group responded to a 911 call reporting a female hiker was “high on mushrooms and in distress.”
Why so many? Not sure if it had anything to do with a Park Ranger’s report that she had “removed all her clothing and was being physically restrained by her companions.”
I’m 39 years old, and you know what I look like with my shirt off?
I’m not saying that Taylor Powers is lucky, but if a 911 call came in that same day reporting that Ritch Duncan is high on mushrooms and in distress on a mountain, the headline in the Huffington Post is going to read “Chubby Naked Bald Man Takes Mushrooms, Dies Horribly on Mountain.”