In the blogging or online journalism game, the headline is vitally important to a story. So when a teenager with gang ties shoots himself in the testicle and initially tells police that ninjas were to blame, there are a multitude of different ways to introduce the public to that information. Here’s one of the best:

This is a pretty solid entry. The headline identifies that something has happened to a “gangbanger” which right off the bat identifies the subject of the headline as a bad person, and therefore exempts the reader of any guilt they might feel about the horrible things that have happened to this person, ie: a bullet in the danglers. It also has the added bonus of making this guy look stupid over and over again. Oh, he’s a gangbanger? Well, that’s not a smart decision. He had accidentally shot himself? That sounds super dumb. In the nuts? Holy crow, this can’t get any dumber! Blames Ninjas? What is this, some kind of Internet Meme? Well played, Gawker, well played. Now here come the also rans…
C’mon Chicago Tribune. This is why newspapers are dying. This guy shot himself in change purse, and you don’t even mention it? And you have to say “Cops:” first? You’re right to include the Ninjas, but this headline leaves a LOT to be desired.
This is a little better than the Chicago Tribune, but not much. I mean at least they’ve incorporated the all-important testicle angle, but the word groin is vague and weird. Maybe you can’t say “testicle” on NBC? If this is true, that new show Hannibal is going to be terrible.
I’m sorry, he shot himself where? NO, I DIDN’T MEAN THE CITY.
Sigh.
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