I just recovered from my third bout of strep throat this winter. It’s been a whirlwind of penicillin and high-level kvetching. My last strep included a visit to an ear, nose and throat specialist. While checking me for particularly gross things, he threaded a scope with a light into my nose and down my throat.
At this point, most people would just chill. Me? I start making jokes:
“You’re not going to put this on YouTube are you?”
No he said, he wouldn’t. He smiled but — it’s wasn’t that funny. Besides, maybe it wasn’t a video laryngoscope, it might’ve just been a fiberoptic bronchoscope. In which case, my premise sucked. I should’ve quit while I was behind, but of course, I’m an idiot and did not.
Then he says, “Your vocal chords look beautiful.”
I said, “I bet you say that to all the ladies…”
And he laughs. A lot. Which was awesome for my ego, and yes my delivery was wonderfully smoky, except did I mention he was holding a large electric thingy in my nose and down my throat? Not the time to make the dude holding it have any sort of unexpected convulsions.
That was dumb.
I told my man the story and he asked, “How did you do that without gagging?” And I thought about it and replied, “Not sure, really, just talented I guess.”
So there you have it. I can tell bad jokes, maybe even deliver a scholarly lecture with a large metal scope strung up my nose and down my throat. Yeah, I’m bragging… and I feel I perhaps missed a major opportunity in adult film. Ah well.
Image: There are no pics of a hilarious patient or a doctor cracking up anywhere in the world. So enjoy this stock photo of a Chihuahua doctor.