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Art student has 68 vials of his own semen confiscated by school

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Julian Ilcheff Borissoff

You know how it can seem sometimes like art students are just masturbating all day, and passing it off as art?

Well, that was actually the point of the final project of School of Visual Arts student Marc Bradley Johnson, as dully obvious as it is. His artwork, entitled Take This Sperm And Be Free Of Me consisted of a refrigerator with 68 vials of Johnson’s dead sperm, (not pictured) which the audience was allowed to take home. Of course, that was before the school seized the fridge, and threatened to have it disposed of as hazardous bio-waste. The artist responded by claiming his work was being censored,  because OF COURSE HE DID, and then a whole bunch more stuff happened…

You’ll note that as much as I hate idiots like this,  I’ve refrained from putting the word “artist” in quotes, as though to suggest that what he has produced isn’t real art. One of the most essential qualities of art is that it remain free from arbitrary definitions. It’s art if somebody says it is, and somebody has, so it’s art. Is it bad art? Yes. Art with a trivial and obvious premise? You betcha. Gross, tasteless and dumb art? Just one man’s opinion, but ding, ding ding!

What I’m really upset about here isn’t that the school confiscated this kid’s work, it’s that they should have done something a little more simple: failed him.

Of course, there is one happy ending to all this nonsense. At least none of Mr. Johnson’s ejaculate never touched anything where it could have done real damage- like say, the interior of a fertile woman’s reproductive tract.

Art School Seized 68 Vials Of Semen From Student

New York Magazine

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