The entire nation is stunned at the story that Notre Dame football star and Heisman Trophy runner-up Manti Te’o's dead girlfriend was a hoax. But out of everybody tied up in this ridiculous mess, who is the dumbest? Let’s rate the major players on a scale of one to ten, where one is only slightly dim, and 10 is full on stupid. Here are the scores:
Manti Te’o:
If his overall master plan was to create a fake girlfriend, kill her off right before the big game for maximum inspiration with the goal of winning all his games and the Heisman Trophy, he gets points for MASSIVE balls, but brains? Not so sure about that. Plus, if you have the smarts to start something like this in motion, shouldn’t you have a better exit strategy? I guess the jury is still out on all this, but I’ll tell you one thing- if he was just an innocent victim, he’s even dumber than if he’d planned it. DUMB SCORE: 8
Notre Dame:
I’m not going to say that Notre Dame is blameless, but fictional stories about an inspirational lady-friend is a bit of an Achilles heel for them. DUMB SCORE: 6
The Mainstream Sports Media:
Yes they were dumb, but on the other hand, no one died here. Literally . Can they really be blamed for swallowing the lie that a major college football star was telling the truth about having a girlfriend? Successfully fooling members of the sports media seems like it’s impressive, but remember, these are people who have been easily duped for years by known geniuses like Lenny Dykstra and Jose Canseco. Fooling the mainstream sports media is like doing a card trick for a dog. You can do it, but should you really be proud of yourself? DUMB SCORE: 7 (But to be fair, they were a 7 coming into this)
Deadspin.com:
They broke the story about the dead girlfriend that never was, which took a fair amount of journalistic shoe leather, but let’s not forget, these are still people who make a living showing pictures of athlete’s dongs. DUMB SCORE: 4
Johnny Manziel:
Who the heck is Johnny Manziel? Only the guy who actually WON the Heisman trophy. Here are some pictures of his living, non-fictional model girlfriend posing with the Heisman trophy. BOOR-ING! If you are the best football player in the country, have a smoking hot girlfriend who likes to take sexy pictures of herself and no one is talking about you, how bright can you be? DUMB SCORE: 6
Full Timeline of Manti Te-o and Lennay Kuka Story
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