The White House has officially said we will not be building a Death Star.
“The Administration does not support blowing up planets,” said Paul Shawcross, chief of the science and space branch of the White House Office.
See, the administration made a promise to seriously consider any petition on that got 25,000 signatures on its We the People site, without factoring in the awesome tidal power of stupid stuff on the internet.
Heck, if a Facebook page for fans of menstruating everywhere can get over a thousand people, something as cool as a Death Star is a shoe-in.
Shawcross also noted two other reasons we can’t build a planet-busting space base:
- The construction of the Death Star has been estimated to cost more than $850,000,000,000,000,000. We’re working hard to reduce the deficit, not expand it.
- Why would we spend countless taxpayer dollars on a Death Star with a fundamental flaw that can be exploited by a one-man starship?
Curses! This Shawcross has some good dumb points. Ah well.
The We the People site also has considered and, in some cases, acted on important issues raised on the petition site. But if you want to know about those, you’d be reading a serious news site, not a super mega fun one like this.