I’ve never really understood wine.
But wine made of of human feces? I understand that even less.
According to a website called Rocket News, which advertises itself as “yesterdays news from Japan and Asia today,” there is a kind of wine produced in Korea called “tsongsul,” that can be made with chicken, dog, or human feces. I’m not positive if this is a real thing or not, but Rocket News either thinks it is, and keeps writing about it, or are lying weirdos. By way of example, just one of their posts on the subject is called “Korean Feces Wine is a Real Thing and We’ve Got Two Bottles of it, Contains Cat Bones as Well.”
So here’s where I stand on this so far- if Korean poop wine is real, that’s dumb, because you know what’s readily available all over the world? WINE WITHOUT POOP IN IT. If you had the option of drinking wine without poop in it, why would you decide to drink the one wine that did have poop in it? It’s bonkers. Or, conversely, If Korean poop wine isn’t real, that’s also dumb because WHY WOULD YOU MAKE THAT UP? And why would you add the additional, gross detail about cat bones!? WHAT IS THE MATTER WITH PEOPLE?
Sadly, the existence of Korean poop wine or the conspiracy to make people believe in the existence of Korean poop wine isn’t even the weirdest part of this. In another post, Rocket News took things a step further, and apparently tricked five women into drinking some Korean poop wine as a joke, which puts this thing up on a whole new level.
According to this post, someone from Rocket News 24 not only tracked down two bottles of Korean poop wine, but served it to five hot girls, and chuckled at how funny it was that they were saying nice things about it. Or, in their words:
How our reporter managed to sit there and listen to a group of beautiful Japanese women in their early twenties liken liqueur sweetened with human feces to a fine wine without bursting into laughter is beyond us.
Uh, how did he manage to not burst into laughter? Maybe because he’s an monster who for some reason thinks that tricking women into eating poop is an acceptable prank, and not a felony? Anyway, all the women said they liked the Korean poop wine, maybe because they were being oh, what’s the word…. POLITE- and then the “reporter,” which is bit of an stretch of a job title for a guy who is secretly feeding people human poop, breaks the news to them that the wine had poop in it. And cat bones. According to this far-fetched tale, the women then recanted their claims and exclaimed that it “tasted like s**t.”
So the takeaway here is this:
1) If this is real, it’s a seriously demented and horrible joke and Rocket News 24 should get some therapy.
2) If this was all fake and a total set up, it was a weird, troubling and misogynist to make up a story about tricking hot chicks into eating poop and Rocket News 24 should get some therapy.
Go get some therapy, Rocket News 24!