Thanks to the Bikini Basketball League, now underway in Miami, my dreams of becoming a professional athlete may actually
At 5’2” (and a half), I was surprisingly never tall enough to make a career as a basketball player. But thanks to male egos and
a lack of feminist protesters, I may have a shot!
The tryouts for the Bikini Basketball League are being held
in Miami. Players will be chosen based on skills, boobs, personality,
athleticism, boobs, drive, competitiveness and boobs.
To me this reads: if you played
basketball at a community college or decent Division III school, can laugh, run
up and down a court for a little while, have a drivers license, looking to win
a couple games and put on your own make up so you don’t look ugly… enh, you might as
well try out.
I can only think how proud my father would be to have me try
out to be the next bikini baller! Basketball always was his favorite sport and
it seems like the league is legitimate. Powerade is already on board as one of
the sponsors — unlike the WNBA who have local car companies and law firms who
sponsor as tax write-offs. (I am hopeful Victoria’s Secret will be a sponsor, too,
since they now carry push-up sports bras.)
If you and I share this very same dream of becoming a
professional athlete while bringing women's sports to a new level, then
maybe this is for you too.
P.S. The Bikini League may also be hiring referees, which is good
for all of you recently out of work.
Image: Frank W / Wikipedia