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Dumb News: Sexually explicit emails apparently fight corruption

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Sexy Emails FOR JUSTICE A councilman in Central Indiana is explaining the sexually explicit emails he sent to a female co-worker as "a ruse designed to expose corruption," and not evidence of an extramarital affair. If this somehow turns out to be anything but the dumbest excuse known to man, we'll print a full post retraction. [IndyStar]

Erin Go BLARRRGH The nice thing about having St. Patrick's Day fall on a weekend is the videos of drunken morons are all queued up and ready to go on Monday. Here's a group of bozos racing across the luggage racks of a commuter train and then, of course, recklessly brawling. [Gothamist]

Sitting Pretty  What's the best reason to get a new all-terrain wheelchair? You guessed it! So a Tyrannosaurus Rex will eat your friend instead of you. [FailBlog]

Orange Crushed 12 employees fired for wearing matching orange shirts. Sadly, this story isn't about the New York Mets. [Daily Mail]

Blonde Ambition Not to go too old school blonde joke on you, but how long does it take a blonde to figure out it takes an hour to go 80 miles if you are traveling 80 miles an hour? Even if the young lady in this clip is just playing dumb, (and she has to be, right?!) she's playing it like a pro. [DailyWh.at]

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