Bettie is a real-life dominatrix. Based in Dallas, Texas, the 23-year-old philosophy student has spent the last three years making a living beating the crap out of submissive men. She took time away from spanking to speak with us about her very unusual job.
Here, she shares the dumbest things about being a dominatrix.
What does a dominatrix do?
I do domination. I see clients who are looking to explore fetishes where they are always in the submissive position. It can be as simple as a spanking, or a foot fetish session where someone tells me I have pretty feet for an hour. I have a lot of clients that see me for wrestling sessions. I do squeezing sessions; I have strong thighs, and some people just want to be squeezed by my legs and that’s it. You also get people who want to be tied up or have you put duct tape all over their bodies so they can’t move. Everybody’s got a fetish.
What’s the dumbest thing about being a dominatrix?
That I can go to jail for giving a spanking. If someone gets naked, and my client gets aroused while I’m spanking them, that’s technically prostitution. I could not know that he's turned on, I could not even be touching him, and I could go to jail. They can penalize anybody who violates the social code of having all your sexual encounters be free. Most of us don’t touch penises at all, unless we’re hurting them.
What are the dumbest things customers do?
Most are white, male, and middle-aged. These guys have gone for years without having an opportunity to express their fetish. They have these crazy ideas about how it’s going to happen because they’ve been thinking, dreaming, masturbating about how it’s going to be for years. And sometimes there’s no real climax to it. A lot of clients come with unrealistic ideas. That, and being so freaked out about their own fetish, they think if you aren’t freaked out by it, there must be something wrong with you.
What dumb reactions do you get when you tell people what you do for a living?
Women are usually really inquisitive. They want to know every detail, “What are the clients like?” Single girls are like, “I’d like to do that.” People in relationships are like, “Well, isn’t that cheating?” Well, not really. It’s not a big deal if you really think about it. Men are usually like, “So you’re a prostitute.” I don’t have sex with anybody, sorry.
Do people make dumb assumptions about your personal life?
Sometimes when I come out about my work, people will assume because I do that for a living, that’s what I’m interested in in my personal life. It’s a job. Strippers don’t want to just strip for everyone that they date.
Are customers ever dumb about paying?
I require my payment upfront. I had one guy who was only with me, like, 10 minutes. He freaked out about the session. He was super-nervous. He wanted me to humiliate him. He wanted me to talk about his small penis. And it was small. I could have gone on and on for days. He took his pants off and was standing there, and he was shaking. He was like, “I want my money back.” I was like, “Dude, I will f**k you up. I am not giving you your money back. I don’t give a s**t if you’re satisfied. You paid me. I’m keeping your money, period.”
When Bettie isn't dominating men, she's blogging at this grown-up, not-entirely-safe-for-work website.