Pot head We're not going to go so far as to call Republican presidential hopeful Rick Perry dumb. Still, we are duty-bound to report that in 1994, the current Texas Governor did say "my brain is like a chicken pot pie." Sounds delicious!  [Politico]

Radio goo goo Right wing radio lady Monica Crowley is upset that the Politico article we linked above asserted that Rick Perry might be dumb. This would be a better point if she didn't back it up with "they also said that about George W. Bush and Sarah Palin." CUT TO RICK PERRY: "Um- can you stop helping now?"  [MonicaMemo]

Chicago dopes Convicted sex offenders need to work too. Of course, the first job that springs to mind probably shouldn't be "babysitter" [Chicago Tribune]

Meth and Relaxation Finally, I understand those weird "Calgon, take me away" ads. The mom was super high! [Fosters.com]

Nutcracker Sweet How does a nice, cool combo of rum, vodka, whiskey and Kool-Aid, served out of the back of a barbershop sound? If you answered "horrible," you're probably right. Either way, party's over, kids. [Manhattan Times]

Not kid friendly "It's 11:30 PM. Do you know where your children are?" I really hope you just answered "yep- they're out stealing goats from a petting zoo." [FreePress]

No bull It's really not often you side with an insurance company, but it's also not often some idiot decides it would be a good idea to let bulls stampede through a suburb of Phoenix, AZ [Yahoo!News]

Full circle It's not rare to find a news story in a Los Angeles paper about someone who thinks the universe revolves around them. Still, this one's a little more extreme. [Los Angeles Times]

We have a problem As though cancelling the space program wasn't dumb enough, even the Houston Astros baseball team are losing their identity. (VIDEO)  [SullyBaseball]

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