Being a lonely, unlucky in love sap is not just for us pedestrians. Apparently, this is a problem for the bold and beautiful as well. So much so that British babe Elizabeth Hurley is actually back together with bumbling Brit Hugh Grant. They were already together for thirteen years and split amicably enough despite a relationship with no spark and Hugh getting a little backseat blowie from Divine Brown who it turns out was not a tranny.
I am always mixing up the sexual exploits of Hugh Grant and Eddie Murphy.
Is it that bad out there in Tinseltown that your only option is to go dragging your knuckles back to a boring comfort zone of Grant-ness? Elizabeth! What are you doing?
Ms. Hurley has been unlucky in love, allegedly having been cheated on by basically everyone she has dated or married. It can be said she gravitates toward dating men of power and prestige who have financial assets out the wazoo. While that sounds wonderful for the old pocket book, you are dating jerks who do not see you for the delectable dish you are. If you're going to go back into the swamps of despair and date someone beneath you like Hugh Grant, why not go one step further down and date a hot bartender or welder?
I think you're afraid of dating a commoner, but us regular folk would be REALLY excited to bring you home for Christmas to eat green bean casserole with the family in Minnesota. Instead of dating someone who makes you look good, why not try making someone with a 9-5 look good for a change? Maybe a little dose of philanthropy on your part will keep the fires burning this time around and I'm pretty sure that Derek Hermann from Lansing, MI would not sneak around behind your back if you decided to date him. I can hear the collective high-five and clinking of MGD's of his bros right now when he announces he's dating the very shag-a-delic "Vanessa" from Austin Powers.
Sometimes the best relationships are the least likely. So I ask you this, do you want to carry on a loveless relationship with Hugh while you compete to learn Italian and take guitar lessons while traveling the world in a sea of complacency? Or do you want to find out what a relationship can really feel like while you make love in the back of a flat-bed Ford parked outside a 7-11 and gaze into the eyes of someone who would be an idiot to leave you?
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