In the U.S. we have a proud history of declaring war on rather broad and ambiguous concepts like drugs, cancer and terrorism. In each case these campaigns have proved wildly successful.
Think about it. Do you know a single person that's used a drug since the Rockefeller laws were passed in 1973? Can you recall the last time time you saw a story on the news about terrorism? And I haven't heard about cancer in so long that I had to google it just to figure out how to spell the word.
That is why, in light of recent events in Korea, that I propose we declare a war on war. Only by blasting, incinerating and annhillating the very idea of war itself will we ever be able to rid ourselves of this horrible, globe-consuming plague.
So join me. Wherever you see war I want you to strike it down. Smack it, shoot it, blow it to pieces wherever you find it. We must show war no mercy. Anyone that does is clearly an enemy of peace and therefore should be put in front of a firing squad and shot for treason.