I know it's only May, but I'm guessing this may wind up being the Dumb as a Blog Quote of the Year:
"If he had had a gun he would've shot me. But he had a banana."
That how North Carolina cafe owner Bobby Ray Mab described the incident last week in which John Steven Szwalla (pictured) allegedly tried to rob Mab's store by pretending to be holding a pistol underneath his jacket; in fact, it was a piece of fruit. But the owner, who assumed Szwalla's weapon was real, still attacked the would-be thief and tackled him to the ground.
To make the story even more fantastic, Szwalla, in an apparent attempt to outwit cops, ate the banana before the authorities arrived. He did, however, leave the peel, which is now in police custody. Szwalla, 17, has been charged with attempted armed robbery.