Like Thanksgiving? 10 Reasons to Think Again
Thanksgiving is about eating too much turkey and falling asleep in front of the Big Game, yes, but it is also about remembering the sacrifices the original Pilgrims made when they settled on America’s rocky shores, right? Maybe not. Here are ten conspiracy theories that will have your rethinking Pilgrims and the very meaning of Thanksgiving.
1. Pilgrim Society
Not every Pilgrim wears austere clothes, dines on turkey, and settles the New World. Some Pilgrims are out to destroy you. Or, at least, so posits a conspiracy theory about the shadowy Pilgrim Society, which has been in existence for at least a century. Ostensibly, the goal of this secret society is to encourage relations between the U.S. and Great Britain. But conspiracy theorists suspect that their goals are the establishment of English as a world language and the world-wide dominance of Anglo-Saxons.
2. The Pilgrims Were Communists
Forget being democracy loving, God-fearing immigrants. According to Tom Retterbush, the Pilgrims were actually idealistic socialists, who believed in sharing wealth and communal property. But of course, Retterbush wants you to know that their socialism failed and failed miserably. In fact, the only reason the first Thanksgiving even happened was because the re-institution of private property finally motivated the Pilgrims to grow a surplus of food.
3. Devilish Origins
Think that the Pilgrims were praying to God at that first Thanksgiving? Think again. Some conspiracy theorists believe that the Christian veneer of Thanksgiving is just a front for Devil worship. Harvest festivals have existed for centuries, and theorist conjecture that the Pilgrims were influenced by those Roman holidays. Evidence of their pagan influence on Thanksgiving exists today with the celebration of the symbol of corn and the cornucopia.
4.The Pilgrims Were Murderers
It’s no secret that the arrival of the Pilgrims in the New World didn’t bode well for the Native Americans. But history depicts that first Thanksgiving as a moment of peace and unity between the Pilgrims and the Native Americans. Not so, according to Conspiracy Planet, which argues that the Pilgrims were really thankful for the eventual death and slaughter of the Native Americans. The Pilgrims feasted to celebrate the death of Native Americans, an indication that the Pilgrims were part of God’s favorite race.
Instead of escaping the religious intolerance of 17th century Englad to live in religious freedom in the New World, some conspiracy theorist believe that the Pilgrims were actually Freemasons. The goal of these Masonic Pilgrims was to establish a New World Order actually free of all religion and where only the elite would rule.
6. The Establishment of Capitalism
What did the Pilgrims really have to be thankful for? Why, capitalism, of course. According to the site Poor and Stupid, the first Thanksgiving was truly a celebration of the success of the capitalist model, which the Pilgrims established early on through trading with the Native Americans. The site authors posit that this “capitalist” exchange system was crucial in their survival and the establishment of America.
7. Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade is Evil
Need proof that Thanksgiving is evil? You don’t need to look father than your television. One website deconstructs the symbolism of the Macy’s Thanksgiving Day parade to prove that the holiday is really about the Devil. For example, the parade uses of the symbol of the ram, which represents the Devil. It also uses lots of fairy tale characters, such as Mother Goose, who apparently symbolizes witches.
8. The Bloodline of Lucifer
Those holy Pilgrims weren’t so holy after all. A series of rambling videos on YouTube all have one thing in common: they argue that by killing the Native Americans the Pilgrims gave their souls to the Devil, thereby proving that they were from the bloodline of Lucifer. Ergo, the videos argue, everything to do with Thanksgiving is inherently evil. So put down that turkey leg and back away slowly.
9. The Myth of Friendship
Daniel Paul, the author of We Were Not Savages, argues that the Pilgrims and Native Americans were never friends. He says that despite outreach from the Native American community, the locals were not even invited to the first Thanksgiving and, to add injury to insult, just days before the original feast, Myles Standish led a raid to chop off the head of a local chief.
10. An Early White Power Group
Paul also recounts how Myles Standish cut off the head of a Native American named Wituwamat and displayed his head on a pike in Plymouth. This gesture, according to Paul, was an early symbol of White Power. Although, there is no conclusive historical evidence that indicates this was his intention.
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